This Is What The Guy You Deserve Will Be Like

He’s the one who is willing to come pick you up and not just meet you somewhere.

The guy who makes plans he sticks to. The one who will call you on a Monday to take you out on Friday and he cares enough to make a reservation.

Because he wants to take you to his favorite places and experience it with you.

He’s the one who isn’t going to have time for games or nonsense. Someone who is so nice and honest and so real, you question it. But you also value it.

Because something so simple as an answered text or reaching out first shouldn’t mean much but it does.

The guy you can sit with in a car and the silence isn’t awkward. The one who plays your favorite artist even though he hates her. But smiles looking at you as you sing along. The one who will lean over and kiss you at a red light just. Then hold your hand as he’s driving with one hand.

The one who watches you out of the corner of his eye and you feel your face get a little red.

The guy who can make you laugh not because the joke is funny but because of how hard he laughs at himself.

The guy who knows what a real date is. From holding open doors and pulling out chairs. The type of guy who stands up when you excuse yourself from the table and lets you order first. The guy who doesn’t let you even try and pick up the tab. He just says, ‘you’ll get it the next one.’ But for some reason next doesn’t happen because he keeps saying the same thing.The guy who stands on the outside of the sidewalk because a real gentleman knows that’s still a thing. The type of guy who holds the umbrella over you even though he’s getting wet.

The one who will send flowers to your office or chocolate just because.

The guy who can’t wait to introduce you to his family because he can’t stop talking about you to them. When he brings you around to meet his friends they already know about you.

The type of guy who values sex and knows to wait.

He’s hand you hold during a cab ride and the smile where not much needs to be said but you feel it.

The thoughts that cross your mind not just when it’s late and you’ve had too much to drink but when it’s 2:00 in the afternoon and you just want to know how his day is going.

He’s the text when you’re out with your friends not needing to talk to you but he says something simple like ‘I hope you’re having fun I’m thinking of you.’ The one who makes sure you got home safely.

He’s the trust you have in someone when you used to think you can only trust yourself.

Different is the only word you can come up with.

He’s the arms that pull you closer when you are tossing and turning at night. The one you wake up next to and you don’t rush leaving. He’s the five more minutes that might make you late. The goodbye for now not for good.

He’s the resolution when there’s a fight because in the past, you’ve always been used to people leaving. But together you work through it.

The guy who is going to build you up in every sense of the word because he knows you don’t need him to succeed and do well but he wants to be a part of it.

The one who has never tried to change you from the moment you met. Even though you have your own flaws, shortcomings, and vices.

What he fails to realize is his love and support is what makes you better women.He looks at you in a way no one else has before and with him, you feel safe. You feel at home in the arms of someone you never thought would come to mean this much. But it is in him you find the better parts of yourself.

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words.

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