You Don’t Know It Now, But You’ll Be Sorry You Let Me Go

By Lauren Strillacci

Love is hard. Even for the ones that make it look like it’s easy, it’s hard. But loving you was extra hard. It was a labor of love that I labored for each and every day. And I did it by choice. I did it because you needed love. But with you, love is not enough.

I knew you needed love, but what I didn’t know was how much you needed me more. I’ve come to realize that you didn’t stay for the love, you stayed for the stability. I was your lighthouse, guiding your shipwrecked self home after you caught yourself in another storm. No matter how many times, or how big you messed up, I was there to rescue you.

Who is going to pick you back up after you knock yourself down? Who are you going to run to when you have no one else? I know you think that I’m overbearing. You think that I’m too uptight. But with you, I had to keep the leash short. I had to pull you back in before you tipped over the edge because you are always one step away from your end.

You may not realize this now but everything I did was to keep you afloat. As much as you tried to self-sabotage, I wouldn’t let you. I know there is something in you, deep down, telling you I was right. That I tried everything I could, that I gave away so much of me to save you.

One day you’ll be sorry that I’m not there to throw you a life vest. You’ll be sorry that you lost the one person that still believes in you. You’ll be sorry that you have to endure this all alone. You don’t know it now, but you’ll be sorry you let me go.

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Written by Elna Brad

Passionate rather, food enthusiast and former Slay Queen

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